TIME

Since the beginning of time, man has yearned to hold hands with a cat.

RETWEET

Due to the small number of followers I have, I am able to acknowledge every retweet with a heartfelt personal note, and occasionally even a gift.

FUNERAL

I had a friend who was a clown, when he died all his friends went to his funeral in different cars.

NOTE

In the privacy of his home Jesus wore slacks.

A PLAY

“Do you want to give the babysitter a ride home, honey?”

“I let Freddie Kruger drive her home!”

“Oh, no!”