the bulls

the bears

the killer bees

walloped by the massive hand

the human slingshot

human slingshot with roller skates

red rocket between my legs Wile E. Coyote style as I soar over a pond

bungee cord porta potty

rent-a-car demolition derby

swimming with sharks

snakes

tasers

white knuckling it through an all-nighter for fear of a prank

a random projectile blasted at my nuts

 

fuck it—the fart mask too

 

I’d endure it all

to not be in this theater alone

for a group I could call my friends

buddies to embrace

to grow old with

silver-haired on the silver screen

like Johnny Knoxville,

Steve-O

and crew